schwermetallschatz666

songs ive cried to this week (condensed): no one like you - scorpions holy diver - dio the toxic waltz - exodus lets get it up - ac/dc holy wars … the punishment due - megadeath

personally, i grew up way over religious and when i wanted to listen to my grandpas music, learn the electric guitar, wear jeans to church, and generally walk around bringing dishonor on my family and feminine appeal, that was swiftly banned. and this was only ~15 years ago. 2005-2007ish. liking things that mostly boys liked meant i was a whore? personally, i consider that a separate matter entirely. metal is home. metal is sitting in the passenger seat with the windows down knowing you’re exactly where you're supposed to be for once in your life. its comfort and its pain. it captures that tortured part of our hearts that draws us all together. i was so disappointed when i finally made it out to where the rest of the people were and found that none of them were possible to really connect with. i’m not here to shit on anyones interests but just can’t get down with reality stars, influencers, content creators. or whatever new kind of celebrity is floating around these days. i still live a pretty isolated life (more so in recent years duh). i never really learned how to connect with people. (i was always “one of the guys” but that’s really shit on nowadays so idk) (my mom is also a narcissist so maybe i just have issues with women :D) but i can still put on any of my favorite albums and let it move me to tears knowing theres a few thousand brothers (and maybe a few hundred sisters) who truly understand. no context. no explanation. just the music. other than that i just personally would prefer not to get caught in a pit. and a lot of guys assume you are poser if you don’t like anything more than heavy metal ime.

i had quite a different understanding of the Devil’s cucumber. ty for clarifying.

I think someone has a crush

I desperately need some sort of community honestly. I am very lonely hahaha but I've done it to myself. Yes, very over-religious and misguided younger parents (who are not yet 50), one of which was a step parent. No overt physical abuse other than spanking but mentally, I have finally come to terms with the fact that terrorized is an accurate description. Hard to label things like that when they are so normal to you. I stay away from Christian shit as much as possible lol but thank you. Listening to Dio or Scorpions now is like a balm. Something that's been missing for a long long time. Probably have my hopes set too high on how long it will take me to pick stuff up once I get a guitar but I can't wait to have an excuse to just repetitively drown myself in the music. It is always good to know someone understands where you come from. On the outside we were normal church people 😛 Thank you, I appreciate it.

I didnt really see a recent thread of memes.

are you tempting me or warning me? lol

I definitely am. I did take lessons as a kid but for acoustic, because that's what was allowed. Some piano and harmonica as well but nothing like, proficient. I mostly sang until my voice teacher got fired. Definitely seems like music was purposely kept from my life but I have always been driven back to it. It's a little emotionally overwhelming honestly and it feels a bit still to be crying while listening to Dio sometimes but church is church I guess. Thank you for the guidance. We can be ignorant together \m/

So, starting with some TMI. Recently through therapy I have become aware that I have never really done or invested in anything that I am truly interested in or passionate about because of past abuse. Heavy metal was one of those things, as well as desperately wanting to learn how to play the electric guitar. My grandpa is a metal head so I had a lot of exposure when I was younger that was then banned from my life, so I am aware and also embarrassingly unaware of anything relevant or even the names of bands and songs that I do like in a lot of cases. Anyway, I'm 30 and my name is Trinity and I am just trying to kill two birds with one stone and find some people to talk to who are interested in music.